ok. i'm really supposed to slp. but cant. cant cant cant cant cant.

spent the past few hours in fb. here and there.. duno doing wat. jus to pass time.
then i did the ultimate thing. i went to my blog histories.
to the year 2007..
and i realised i was quite happy then, the bubbly cheerful me.
2008.. abit sad.. but still not bad. i think this year is the worst year.

i seem to have been upset most of the year. and i continue to be upset.
maybe because suddenly i'm not so loved anymore.
i saw the pic of the couple ring that we took. i wished we never bought the rings. seriously. ( DEC 07)
from the day u lost urs, i should have known.
and when did it become boring for jus 2 person to go out? when we did it for 2 whole fucking years?

no pt looking at the past right, cuz last time u were this sweet and wonderful man.
i miss my sweet and wonderful man.
i tot he came back.. i tot i saw him for a while..
and then he left again..

i miss the cheerful me.
the happy person.
i said i will wait.. but my determination not so strong liao.
this is second time le.. i know to u.. cannot wait = too bad.
cuz u dun treasure this thing at all..
cuz ure rich, successful, got money, got car, u wan women got women.
who am i anymore to u?
nobody.


i miss the amazing man whom i fell in love with. where is he?
he didnt meet me everyday. he didnt chauffeur me around.
he didnt buy me expensive gifts. he jus used his heart.
he simply gave me his heart. the very pure and innocent kind of rs.
he made me smile with his simple jokes, simple food..
he was much more patient, loving and kind..

u keep saying look to the future. i'm looking.
i'm jus stating the things i miss about u thats all.
somehow it doesn change the fact that i still love u now.
but i wish i jus wish..