well.. things are still not so good.

first of all, i'm still jobless. but working at pat's place for a while.. hopefully, do my resume and send out will have some response :( but i'm procrastinating. jus so much to type the resume.. and need to think.. of how to phrase .. so that it doesn sound lame.

2nd of all, relationship wise.. there but not there.. i hoped it would be like what it used to be. as in the sweet msgs, the calls here and there.. but i'm not getting much responses unless its a question and ans msg. well.. better than nothing? at least i know we're meeting next week.. but i'm not hoping that its suddenly all gonna be ok. ya
maybe slowly..

well well well.. who would have thought.. jus look at 2 posts ago. i had a job.. a relationship that was quite crazy at times.. but nonetheless, we tried to work things out..

i do have my friends.. thanks very much for being there.. for the past 1 week plus. listening to my complaints, my stupid voice, my demoralised face.. helping me stand up.. and taking the time off to accompany me..
and spending abit more time with my family.. coz i'm mostly at home..

but i still miss u.. i cant believe i dun dare to call u now. i need to think 10 times before i msn u, msg u.. i need to tell myself to cool down everytime i dun see a reply and when there is a reply.. to not expect much.. coz it might be something polite.. and not lovey-dovey like they used to... for me its difficult... i dunno about u.. i trying not to think so much till next week..

of coz.. moving on.. i hope i'll be able to get a job.. soon. and also secure the relationship.. i'm greedy. i want both at the same time.. but sometimes.. i'm at a lost.. i dunno what you want, what the job wants, what the world wants..